CP #3
Time: 8-9pm
Date: 9/26/14
Location: Cantina in college town
This Friday Savannah and I meet with my conversation partner
Daree. Once we were sat our server brought us water. It was funny when she
asked if we wanted anything else to drink and Daree asked for a menu; he was
asking for a food menu but she thought it was a drink menu. As the server
started to explain what there was to drink Savannah and I helped the server
understand what he meant. We discussed what we did the past week and what his
plans were for the upcoming weekend. After we ate, I thought it would be a nice
gesture to pay for the tab. I snuck off to the back and handed the server my
card. Suddenly it occurred to me that this might be offensive, since females
generally do not pay the bill in his culture. Nonetheless, it was too late once
the server walked away. As I stood there and processed what I just did, I
realized that Daree was learning about American culture and should be open to
the differences between American and his own culture. When I went back to the
table he asked for the check and I told him that I already took care of it. At
first he didn’t understand and proceeded to sign the credit card receipt with a
50% tip and his signature, not realizing it was my credit card receipt. Then I
explained further how I had already paid the tab. As expected he was not happy
about the situation. Once I explained to him that it was my pleasure and
females can pay the bill in American culture he was a little more accepting of
the situation. Also I promised him next time we hung out he can pay for my
dinner to make it even, this made him happy. After a nice dinner we parted way
I went to work and Daree and Savannah continued their Friday night.
I think he might be in the class that I observed on Friday. They were just learning about restaurant ordering that day :) Good observation about paying for his meal. I bought my CP a drink last Wednesday and did not think of that either. I had told him ahead of time that I was paying, so I think it went OK. However, as you point out it can make communicating that a little difficult if someone's culture is not used to the gesture.
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